@Stealing Mangoes & Wrinkles

Location: O’ahu [Hawaii Wedding Photographer]

ALOHA!!! I’m back from Ha-vie-ee!

I find it funny that at a glance the blog title almost looks to read “Steel Magnolias.” But, the story I’m about to share has nothing to do with Julia Roberts. It’s even better, because you can eat it. I’m talking green mangoes. Aww, yeah.

In a previous post, I mentioned about the Green Mango Bandits of O’ahu. That I’m one of them. My husband Romie is, too. My mom is three. All in the family we became fugitives circling the island with a bag full of green mangoes and with a car chasing us because of it. Huh???

You see, I have this insatiable craving for crunchy and sour green mangoes that stems from my Laotian upbringing. We slice up these bad boys and dip them in a spicy sauce. My jaws tighten as I think about the tartness. I don’t know how else to describe this. It’s like a vampire’s uncontrollable thirst for fresh blood. Okay, not so much alike. Blood is not even my beverage of choice. Basically, we will do whatever it takes to get our greedy hands on the most sour and the most crunchiest green mango we can find. Which brings us back to the story of the Green Mango Bandits.

In April of 2004, my husband was driving a rental Neon, that would later be known as the “getaway car,” with myself in shotgun and my mom in the backseat. All eyes were on any tree housing green mangoes. We found one. It’s perfect — It’s in someone’s yard. D’oh! But, being a woman, I can justify anything if I really want it. And, I really wanted those mangoes. Like, badly. The tree’s branches cascaded over the fence and beyond the sidewalk. Public domain. Aww, yeah.

I picked by the armful then I tossed them into the car, into my mother’s lap. It seemed enough, but it wasn’t enough for a mango-hungry vampire … So, I went back for more. Just as I had my fill, I heard a scream. It was the owner of the mango tree from whence those mangoes came. Cripes! Then, I heard another scream. It was Romie and my mom. “Get in the car, Bunn!”

It all happened so quickly, like something out of “The Fast and The Furious,” only with uglier cars. Romie merged onto the H1 highway thinking we were safe. But, he was so wrong. We weren’t safe. The owner of the mango tree was right behind us! Huh??? Like, seriously?! We’re on an island … How far can we really go? We’ll come full circle in two hours. Duh!

Romie was able to shake the crazy haole off our tail. But, needless to say, the highway chase had us a little worried. Perhaps we were overly confident from the successful green mango mission in Maui the year before. But, what just happened here??? Did we break an agricultural law or something? No, it couldn’t be. Wait. Maybe? Not much time was spent wondering because Romie and my mom made me toss out the stone-cold evidence. But, but— “Throw them away, Bunn!”

I felt like a child forced to give up her favorite toy to her little sister. Only I’d never see it again, none of the nine mangoes that I held tightly in my grasp. But, like a big kid I did what I was told. *sniff*

Image(s): I don’t take enough photos of my husband because he always request me to remove his wrinkles. I tell him that I like him just the way he is. But, if he really wants those wrinkles gone then it’s going to cost him double. That’s 18 green mangoes. (And, remember the dipping sauce!) Except, we found no green mangoes this time. Instead, we found Kisses with macadamia nuts! YUM!