Hello & Welcome Back … Now Let’s Shoot Film!

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? Though I haven’t posted anything new on the blog since I lost my baby girl, I have been keeping busy posting mostly on my Twitter and Facebook accounts. Part of the silence here was rediscovering my passion; looking for inspirations all around me, and trying to move forward. I can’t wait to share with you what I’ve been up to: I’m relearning how to shoot film— the right way. Falling in love with film all over again has been keeping my mind fresh. Most of the images you’ll be seeing from me will be shot on film. (My assistant Kham captured this behind-the-scenes at a recent beach engagement photos I took on the Oregon Coast.)

Saying Goodbye to Your Dog: But, I can’t say it.

THANK YOU…
For keeping me warm when my toes were cold since I rarely wear socks.
For being there for me when I was home alone; I can’t sleep by myself.
For being so good with all the children who visited; it was just the way you are.
For quickly forgiving me when I wasn’t so patient with you; which was quite often.
For finishing up all the French Fries during our late night fast food runs.
For joining me on all those Starbucks runs, even when you were getting carsick.
For chewing up my favorite dress giving me a reason to buy a new one.
For not keeping track of mistakes, and I’ve made one too many.
For giving me the best birthday gift.

Your name was Magic just like the NBA star. When we brought you home, we called you by a different name, one that is well-known in our favorite Hawaiian vacation spot. For over 10 years, I yearned for children who would grow up and call me their mama, but what I didn’t realize was that I already have a child of my own. In you.

Sure, you have more legs than a normal child. But, you’re still clumsy like me.
Sure, you tend to not hear us when we yell for your attention. It’s called “Selective Hearing.” (Blame the floppy ears!)
Sure, if there was a fetch tournament you’d win last place; you max out at three. Sometimes two depending on your mood.
Sure, you lay around all day and night. You just want your beauty sleep.
Sure, you nearly knock us over whenever we return home. You get excited to see us again, no matter how short of time we are away.
Sure, your tail is the height as our coffee table which gets cleared when you prance by— or become an unfortunate event for tykes.

THANK YOU, MAILE.
For being my perfect baby girl with a cold, wet nose, and four big paws et al. I will miss you so much. But, I know you’re in heaven no longer in pain … No more cancer. Wagging your tail and knocking over all the angels you meet. Please do try not to knock over Lolo & Great Grandma up there. (Dec 2001 – Apr 2012) You took your last breath today … You’re in heaven now. An angel. THANK YOU for filling our days with unconditional love. We love you so much. I’m sorry I didn’t say this enough, if ever: Thank you for having me as your mama.

04/14/12 [Edited to Add]: THANK YOU, EVERYONE… For acknowledging Maile’s life. Your texts, emails, phone calls, and comments did not go unappreciated. Today, we scattered her ashes nearby in the Columbia River, the same place where she used to jet ski with us and play with all the kids. I know she will make her way to the Oregon Coast, her other favorite place to be. She was my sweet baby girl with four big paws … I miss her everyday.

Film Is Not Dead: Miami Photography Workshop

This past December, I joined about a dozen talented photographers in Miami, Florida for an awesome workshop all about shooting film, FILM IS NOT DEAD: Miami. During this workshop is when I had an epiphany … It seems like this happens when I need it the most. I’ve been feeling like I’ve lost some inspiration, what had me chugging in this business for four years— Wait. It’s more like five years now because it’s 2012. Happy New Year!!! (Here’s a sneak peek: Photo by Jonathan Canlas.)